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  “So, are you looking forward to your trip next week?” She is off to Wales for a week with school. I’m putting money on that being the reason for Rachel not sleeping and feeling rubbish, she’s been so worried about it. She didn’t want to let her go, but Ami really wanted to, and now with Kevin about to be sentenced, and that crackpot Castle safely behind bars, there wasn’t really any reason why she shouldn’t go.

  “I can’t wait!” She answers excitedly. In the distance a group of kids start waving in our direction.

  “Go on, you go in and I’ll wait until the bell has gone.”

  “Thanks Tad, see you later.” She runs off towards her friends and they all stand in the playground talking enthusiastically.

  At least this keeps me away from the playground Mums, I think as I lean up against the fence while I wait for Ami to go into school. From the corner of my eye I can see a group of Mums all turning to look at me from the other side of the fence. I try to hide my eye roll as I notice them all suddenly needing to exit the playground.

  I grab my phone from my pocket and text Rachel.

  Be home soon baby. Love you x

  Before I’ve even put my phone away I’m surrounded, on all sides.

  “Hi, you’re Ami’s stepdad aren’t you?” One of them says.

  “Uh yes, I guess so. Nice to meet you.” I try not to make eye contact because I really don’t want to get stuck into conversation with these women. I wouldn’t mind if they had anything real to talk about, or even just wanted to make polite chit chat to the parent, well step parent, of one of their child’s classmates. But they just stand and flutter their eyelashes and pry for details about mine and Rachel’s relationship.

  “Got a date set for the wedding yet?” Another asks.

  “Uh, not yet no.” And as if I would tell you even if we had!

  Thankfully just before another stupid question is asked I hear the bell ring, and start to make my escape. “Not to be rude ladies but I must be heading home to my beautiful fiancée. Have a lovely day.”

  Rachel

  Ican’t work out who is more worried about Ami’s trip next week, me or my Dad!

  “Honestly, Rachel, I don’t mind going along just in case she needs anything. We can take the caravan and have a break ourselves?”

  “Dad, honestly, she will be fine! Please stop worrying so much, you’re making me more worried!”

  “I’m sorry princess, just after everything, well, you know. I’m just a bit protective of you both that’s all.” I take my phone and cup of coffee into the front room and sink into the sofa.

  “I know Dad. Anyway I’m not trying to get rid of you, but I have a massive pile of washing and ironing to get done so madam can pack when she gets home from school.”

  “Okay, I’ll speak to you later then.”

  “Love you Daddy.”

  “Love you too Princess.”

  I throw my phone onto the sofa next to me and switch the TV on. Jeremy Kyle is mid argument with a man explaining that he must be able to remember cheating on his partner, or the lie detector wouldn’t have picked up that he was lying. I decide that the washing can wait as I curl up on the sofa and get sucked into the crazy argument on the telly.

  A little while later I hear keys in the door and a few seconds later I feel his warm arms wrap around my shoulders.

  “How you feeling now baby?” He asks through little kisses on my neck.

  “I’m okay thanks. Ami go in okay?” He walks around and sits next to me on the sofa.

  “Yeah, well, she did, but just before we parked, the news on the radio started talking about Kevin.”

  “Oh God, was she okay?” I suddenly feel a bit panicky, we knew the trial had ended and he was being sentenced, but I wanted to wait to tell her until we knew exactly what was going on.

  “She was fine, we had a chat, and she gave me a cuddle then ran off to her friends.” He lifts his arm behind my head and pulls me in close to him, and immediately I feel a little calmer. “Have you heard anything yet?”

  “Not yet, the phone went earlier but it was just my Dad checking in.”

  “I’m sure it will be soon.”

  The trial was intense. Well, trials. It’s all I seem to have done most of the last year. Having two separate court cases going on, both for such serious offences, was not easy at all. Theo’s was, thankfully, much quicker than Kevin’s. He was charged and found guilty of possession of an explosive substance with intent, and attempted murder. After hearing all the evidence and details of everything Peters did to taunt Tad and I, the judge gave him the maximum sentence of life in prison.

  Having to relive those moments where I thought I was going to lose Tad was horrendous. He came so close to dying in my arms, in the middle of our kitchen, all because some idiot couldn’t handle how badly he had fucked up. At least that was over relatively quickly.

  Kevin’s case however seemed to be never ending. His list of crimes was huge, and horrific. Once he was arrested, people began to come forward about things that he had done to them in the past. Awful things. He has assaulted victims, tampered with evidence and even stalked female members of staff.

  During the trial I met the parents of the girl he murdered. Seeing their broken faces, watching them fall apart in that court room, is something I will never ever forget, until the day I die. I felt, and still feel, guilt like you wouldn’t believe. If only I had spoken up earlier, if I had just done something earlier, she could have been saved.

  I can feel my eyes start to gloss over as the memory of her mum breaking down seems imprinted in my mind. Quickly, I stand and head to the kitchen to make coffee.

  From the side I hear my phone ringing, I quickly jump up and see my lawyer’s number flashing on the screen.

  “Hello?” I try my best to sound confident, but the quiver in my voice gives me away instantly.

  “It won’t be long now, do you want to be here?”

  Do I want to be there? To watch the man who ruined my life, and so many others, get sent down for hopefully the rest of his life? Part of me does, part of me wants to turn up there all smiles, look in Kevin’s eyes and show him that he hasn’t won. But part of me wants to hide away. I won’t ever be able to shake the guilt that I could have prevented this, and that part of me wants to go and hide in a corner until this is all done with.

  “Is that him?” I feel Tad’s hand on my shoulder as he leans into my phone to try to hear the conversation.

  I nod. “He wants to know if we want to be there.” I say as I slightly hold the phone away from my mouth.

  “Well of course we do, don’t we?” Tad catches sight of my face and his tone changes. “Rachel, you’ve been so brave, so strong during this case. Never mind during the case, but for the whole time you were trapped by that monster. The last time you were in court, you were having to go through some of the most horrific, private details of your life, you were clearly devastated, and that- that thing, he sat there and smiled. He smiled Rach.” Tad’s face has gone a shade of red and from the corner of my eyes I can see him balling his hands up into tight fists. “Go there today with your head held high. Show him that he has not won. You have not only survived him, but you have come out an incredible person the other side. None of this is your fault, none of it, and for you to keep thinking like that just means he is still in your head. Today is the time to get him out of your head for good.” He holds his hand out to me and smiles that smile at me that still makes me tingle. I take his hand and pull the phone back towards my mouth.

  “We’re leaving now.”

  Chapter Three

  “K

  evin Michael Blackford. I have been a judge for over thirty years, and yet in all my time I have never had to deal with a case as horrifying as this one. You started your adult life with a promising career in the Metropolitan Police force, and moved on to Sussex Police to climb your way to the top. You had a perfect home life, with a wife and child, and you were outstanding in all areas of your work. At l
east that is what you would have everyone believe.

  In reality, you used your job role, your stature, to intimidate people; to assault vulnerable victims, to silence other officers who dared question your practices. You abused your own wife, in every way possible. You managed to start a relationship with a woman ten years your junior, based on lies and empty promises, and when Sally Barker dared to stand up to you, you strangled her to death. You then go on to evade the police, and instead of facing up to what you had done, you kidnapped your wife, and then your own daughter! And do you know, even worse than all of that, is that you still show no remorse for any of your actions.” The judge shakes his head and looks down at the papers on his desk.

  Tad is sitting next to me and I have both of my hands in his. His eyes are flitting between the floor and the judge, and every so often he looks at me and gives me a reassuring squeeze. But my eyes are stuck on the figure in the dock. The sunken face of my ex-husband. The man who abused me, the man who tried to make my life hell. His face is bruised and his left hand is bandaged up. I hear prison is not a nice place for police officers.

  “As the jury has found you guilty on multiple charges, the most serious being murder, I have no option but to sentence you to life in prison. It is necessary for me to set a minimum period to be served, and as I am sure you already know this is absolutely not the period you will serve. This is the very minimum amount of time you will serve before you will even be considered for release. That minimum period will be thirty years. You have already served two hundred and thirteen days in remand, so your minimum period for release will be twenty nine years and one hundred and thirty nine days.

  Take him away.”

  Tad leans over and wraps his arms around my shoulders. Two police officers walk up to Kevin and as he stands to follow them, he looks at me. Straight into my eyes. That look used to send fear coursing through me, my hair used to stand up on the back of my neck and I knew something bad was going to happen. But now, nothing. I am about to watch him leave this court where he will then spend at least the next thirty years of his life in prison, locked away with people who will hate him just because of who he used to be. I feel like smiling, I feel like laughing in his face, shouting and cheering. But I hold my gaze, I will not look away. I see him sigh and look down as he turns out of the dock and I smile. I turn to look at Tad who is watching me intently.

  “You okay?” He asks.

  “Better than okay, now let’s forget about that thing and go and spend the rest of our lives together.” My smile practically reaches my ears and I lean in to kiss Tad softly on his lips. As I pull back I can see Kevin trying to shake off the two officers leading him away.

  “Do you really think prison will stop me?” He screams. “This is not over Rachel, I swear to you, this is not over.”

  The judge bangs his gavel, “Get him out of my court, NOW!” He shouts over Kevin, and more officers walk over and push Kevin out of the court, while he is still shouting and screaming.

  “I almost feel sorry for him.” I say out loud, surprising myself.

  “What, why?” Tad says looking confused.

  “I don’t know, but somewhere in his life, something must have gone very, very wrong for him to be this way. I know it doesn’t excuse anything, but he is going to spend every day of the next thirty odd years angry, plotting revenge, hating me and you. He will be hated by every inmate and every guard in every prison he ever goes to. It’s almost sad.”

  “You’re such a good person Rach. It takes an incredibly strong person to be able to feel any sort of sympathy for a monster like that. But sometimes people are just bad. And now he has to pay for everything he has done.”

  “Don’t get me wrong, I’m glad he is going to prison. I know he deserves every second of that sentence, and to be honest with you I don’t want him to ever step foot out into the real world again. It just makes me think that somewhere down the line, before he was like this, something could have happened differently in his life and he may not have ended up like this.”

  “Maybe, but maybe not.” Tad strokes my cheek and I let my head lean into him.

  As we walk through the court room doors, Mr. and Mrs. Barker come over to Tad and I. They smile weakly at me and hold out their hands. I shake Mrs. Barker’s hand and then Mr. Barker’s, but as I go to take my hand from his, he grips it tightly, and wraps his other hand around mine.

  “Thank you for making sure he got sent down for as long as he did.” My eyes begin to water as that overwhelming feeling of guilt creeps over me.

  “Oh Mr. Barker, I’m just so sorry that this has happened. I-” a tear slips from my eye and he interrupts.

  “I don’t ever want you to think that any of this was your fault at all. Ever, you hear me. I don’t care what anyone says, you speaking up sooner may have made no difference at all. It may well have made things worse. Who knows? What I do know is that my daughter was a smart girl with good morals. I don’t know what he said to her or how he talked her into being in a relationship with him, but I swear to you, she was not a bad person.”

  “I don’t for one second think she was.” I smile at the both of them. “Kevin is, was, an evil, manipulative man, and I’m just so sorry that your daughter got caught up in it.” Mr. Barker releases my hand and puts his arm around his wife.

  “At least that beast has got exactly what he deserves, I hope he rots in that prison.”

  I just nod as Tad grabs hold of my hand next to me. They turn away and I lean into Tad’s chest.

  Tad

  The sense of relief knowing that Kevin has been put away for potentially the rest of his life is indescribable. We have freedom for the first time. Even though Kevin was caught almost a year ago, there was always some fear that somehow he would be able to worm his way into a reduced sentence. But thankfully, partly down to the evidence Rachel gave, they saw right through him.

  He tried to claim that Rachel was a cheat. That he was a doting husband who just wanted to be loved by Rachel, but that she was abusive to him. He said that one day he snapped and that’s why he killed Sally Barker, and then the next few months were him having a mental breakdown. Because Rachel had never been to the police about his behaviour, and he seemed to be such an outstanding member of the community, he very nearly had support in his claims.

  That was when Celine came forward. She said that every time Rachel had come round with a new bruise or mark, she had taken a photo without Rachel noticing, and she had even recorded some of their conversations without Rachel knowing, in the hope that one day she would go to the police. Rachel gave her permission for the photos to be used as evidence, and she gave extremely detailed and absolutely horrifying evidence about everything Kevin put her through.

  But now we can start to put all of that behind us. We don’t have to have a team of security following us around, we can think about the future and know that he won’t be a part of it.

  I didn’t even get to enjoy when Peters was put away, it just felt like one problem had gone but we still had this huge possibility of another even bigger problem.

  But now, sat in Rachel’s parents’ front room, sipping champagne, laughing and joking with them all, the weight of the last year has disappeared.

  “Are you sure it’s okay for Ami to spend the night Mum?” Rachel asks as she puts down her empty champagne glass.

  “I can hear her snoring down the hallway, it wouldn’t be fair to wake her. Let her sleep, she’s had a stressful day. We didn’t have any plans anyway.”

  “Thanks Mum.” Rachel turns to look at me, and smiles. Not just any smile, but a smile that says we have the house to ourselves tonight! “We’re going to head home, but I’ll come and get her early as we are going shopping.”

  “Okay darling, we will see you tomorrow.”

  As soon as I hear the door close behind me, Rachel has thrown herself in my direction. Her hands are frantically running all over my body and her lips are crushing mine. Immediately I feel her kiss, it spread
s right the way through me, like cold water trickling down my body. My cock springs to life from in my boxers and I can think of nothing I’d like to do more right now than lose myself inside this gorgeous woman.

  “Downstairs, now.” I pull myself away from her and manage to put on my sternest voice.

  “Yes Sir.” She whispers excitedly and skips off in the direction of the basement.

  I quickly head towards the kitchen in search of a bottle of wine and some glasses. I can almost feel my skin tingling with excitement for what is waiting for me downstairs. Rachel will look through our trunk of toys, and she will pick out a few things she wants to use. She will then strip to her underwear and kneel in the middle of the floor waiting for me.

  She took me totally by surprise one day, I got a text from her when I was in my office simply saying “Downstairs.” I went down and found Rachel kneeling, almost naked next to the bed waiting for me.

  I reach the bottom of the stairs, and there she is. In a beautiful red and black set of underwear, kneeling on the floor. Her hands are on her legs with her palms facing upwards, and she is looking down at the floor. The sight alone is enough for me to be rock hard by the time I have even reached the bed. Laying across it, are a blindfold, cuffs, and amongst some other things, anal beads. I pick them up and walk towards Rachel.

  “Feeling brave today are we?” I ask as I dangle the beads in front of her face.

  “Yes Sir.” She replies, her eyes not moving from their spot on the floor.

  I walk over to the dressing table and set down the glasses. After I have poured us both a glass of wine I walk over to Rachel.

  “Rachel?” I say as I gently lift her chin to look up at me. “What are your safe words?”

  “Amber and red.”

  “Good girl.” I smile at her and move towards the bed where I pick up a leather paddle. “Stand up.” Immediately she does as she is told and stands before me. I run the paddle along her soft curves and see a trail of goosebumps left along her soft skin. I turn her around so she is facing me and take a sip of wine. Once I have swallowed, I pour more wine into my mouth, but instead of drinking it, I pull Rachel towards me and open my mouth on to hers. The liquid spills out of my mouth into her own, and drips from the places where our mouths don’t quite meet, leaving a trail of wine down her chin, neck and chest. I start to kiss and lick the wine from her skin, starting at her chin and slowly working my way down to her beautiful breasts. Her breathing becomes heavier and faster, and from the corner of my eye I see her fingers desperately trying to reach out and touch me.